


On Both Ends

by eclipse_rain



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-13
Updated: 2020-11-13
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:54:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,031
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27539455
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eclipse_rain/pseuds/eclipse_rain
Summary: How should one manage his feelings towards another person? Is trusting the time enough for love to finally bloom between two people? Or is one leap of courage to take the lead important too?Kuroo has been in love with his childhood friend Kenma ever since they met each other. However, he couldn't bring himself to confess to his bestfriend because he does not want to put their friendship on the line.
Relationships: Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou
Kudos: 4





	On Both Ends

**Author's Note:**

> Italicized characters narrate events in the past.

"Dear family and friends, we have gathered together here at this time to share in the joy and love of these two. Each of you has given something of yourself to help them become what they are, and each of you will have opportunities to give more to them to nurture their new relationship. May the love and affection that has brought them to this point continue to be a blessing to them."

The minister announced as I recalled in my mind the days that brought us here in this situation. 

_"Dad, where are we going?"_

_We just moved to a new house today. I'll be living here with my dad, my grandmother, and my grandfather. My parents' relationship didn't work out so we ended up moving after they divorced. I don't know if it was a good thing but at least I'll no longer hear constant shouting every night. I never had a good sleep and ended up compressing my head between two pillows just so I can't hear them arguing. I kind of developed it as a habit. It was a pain for me to always see them at each other's neck._

_"Well, we must at least greet our neighbor. I think another child live next door. Maybe you guys can get along and be friends."_

_I nodded as he held my hand to walk to our neighbor's home. My dad knocked onto their home. When the door opened, a middle-aged woman welcomed us inside. "Hi, I heard you just moved today. How was it on the way here?" Her hair runs until her shoulders and she was wearing a really nice smile. She seems really nice and warm. At her back, I saw a boy about the same age clutching to her pants. He has a chin-length black hair, and he was wearing a hoodie. But what I've noticed is his golden cat-like eyes. It's really mesmerizing to look at. As if it was bringing me to another dimension._

_"My name is Kuroo, we just moved next door."_

_Although I was shy, I introduced myself to him. I mean, I really want to be friends with him so why not? He looked at me. Then, he looked at my hair. He seemed really weirded out with my hair._

_"Kenma." He plainly stated. His name is as good as he looks. I don't understand but I can't help but admire him even though we just met. Is it even possible?_

_While our parents are talking, we both looked hesitant whether we should start a conversation with each other or not. He doesn't seem to be the type to talk a lot and I don't know how to initiate a conversation either. In the end, we just ended up looking at each other._

_When we returned home, I asked my dad. "Dad, isn't Kenma so beautiful?" My dad just smiled at me and pats my head._

_I spent almost all of my childhood hanging out with Kenma. Although it was awkward at first, as time passed by, we grew comfortably in each other's presence. The adults don't seem to mind when we are always together. Whenever I am left alone at home, I'll go to his house and play virtual fighters with him. "_ _We always play this game. Is there anything else you want to play?" I was shocked to hear him ask me. I nodded in response and immediately left his room to go to my house. I grabbed the ball I used to play back in our old home. I ran back to Kenma's house and showed it to him. He looks confused with what I am holding. I bet he was expecting another virtual game or something._ _We went to a nearby park where I taught him how it was played._

" _You have to put your hands like this. If you do this, the ball will go right up once it hits that part." I said while showing him the right position to receive the ball. Due to my excitement, I didn't notice how much I can raise my voice._

_We spent the whole afternoon playing volleyball in the park. Kenma is really smart; he is a fast learner. Although I already expect him to be so good in virtual games, I did not expect that he would be able to catch up with this kind of physical activities. He prefers staying indoors to play video games in his room all day._

_Years passed, we are now in high school and we are both playing for the school's volleyball team. I became the team's captain and I play as a middle blocker. Kenma, on the other hand, is the team's starting setter. He is considered as the brain of the Nekoma Volleyball team; the strategist of the team. I was able to convince him to join saying that setters do not need to move around much._

_"Kuroo."_

_"Kuroo."_

_"Astaxanthin face."_

_I faced him and said, "That's docosahexaonoic acid to you."_

_"Shut up. Anyway, when are you going to confess to Ken-"_ _I immediately covered his mouth in shock while looking around us, checking if anybody have heard what he said. I was lucky that everyone is busy and no one seem to heard what Yaku was about to say._

_"What are you talking about? No. I am not in love with him. We are literally just friends." I defended myself. I don't want anyone to know how I feel about Kenma._

_He slapped my hands hard and I immediately remove it from his face._

_"Damn Kuroo, are you trying to kill me?"_

_"It's not my fault, you're spitting nonsense."_

_He glared at me._

_"I didn't know that you're truly a moron. You don't even take your eyes off him, you rooster. And don't even deny it. I was calling you but you didn't even bother to look at me because you're too busy to check on Kenma."_

_Yes, Kenma and I are still friends. Nothing have changed. But my admiration from the day I met him, eventually became feelings that I continue to suppress everyday._

_"I-I don't want to ruin our friendship because of these stupid feelings. I want to stay with him for as long as I can. Maybe not now? I'm not quite sure about confessing to him. I'll wait for the right time. If these won't go away soon, I might consider. We're still young. I still have a lot of time to earn courage."_

_Yaku sighs, not convinced with what I said._

_"I respect your decision. I just hope it won't take too long for you to gain enough courage. We can't control the time, Kuroo. The clock will continue to tick even if it's already passed the deadline."_

_6 years later..._

_Today is the day, I'm going to confess to Kenma._

_I went to a flower shop in our village and bought a bouquet of sunflower. Sunflowers remind me of Kenma's pudding hair. As I waited for the lady at the counter to arrange the flowers, I decided to call Kenma. To my surprise, his name is already flashing on the screen._

_Kenma calling..._

_"Hey, Kenma. I was about to call you."_

_"Kuroo, can you meet me at the park near our house?"_

_"Sure. Is there a problem?" I_ _t is just rare for Kenma to initiate a call._

_"No, actually I just want to tell you something. Can you go now? If not I can wait."_

_"No. No. I'll just go grab something then I'll be on my way. I was actually planning to meet you today. I also have something to tell you."_

_"Really? See you, then. Take care."_

_"See you too."_ _The call ended. I can feel the nervousness rushing in my body, again. It's finally happening._

_"Hi, Sir. The arrangement is already finished."_

_I looked back at the counter and saw the lady holding the bouquet of sunflowers._

_"It's really beautiful."_

_"Thank you, Sir. I'm guessing you're about to give this to the man on the phone? Sorry, I didn't mean to eavesdrop on your conversation. It's just that you kinda looked enthusiastic upon talking to him."_

_I felt embarrassed that she actually noticed it._

_"Ah. Yes. He's my best friend and it actually took me long to finally gain courage to take the risk."_

_"I see. I'm wishing you good luck, Sir. Come visit again next time, but with him."_

_I blushed with the thought of me and Kenma together, not as friends but as lovers._ _I took the bouquet after paying and rushed to the park. It's just near but I don't want to keep him waiting. There, I saw the pudding head sitting on a bench._

_"Kenma!" He looked in my direction upon hearing his name. I walk towards him, still catching my breath._

_"Kuroo, why are you panting?"_

_"S-sorry... I actually run on my way here."_

_"Stupid. I told you I'll wait for you."_

_I just laughed at him._

_"So what is it that you're going to say that you actually initiated the call?"_

_His cheeks turned pink and he looks nervous as well._

_"Actually, about that... I've been longing to tell you this before. I believe this is the right time to tell you."_

_"Tell me what?"_

_"Kuroo, I have set my eyes on you from the day that we met. From the moment you move in the house beside ours and our parents introduced us to each other, I've taken a liking on you..."_

"Do you take this man, Kozume Kenma to be your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold, in sickness and health, to love, honor and obey, in good times and woe, for richer or poorer, keeping yourself solely unto him for as long as you both shall live?" 

"I do."

I uttered as I wipe my eyes and stop myself from shedding another tear. Today is a very special day. I can feel the happiness coming from the man that I've loved for so long. I should not spoil the moment by crying. 

_"I've taken a liking on you..." He stopped as if he was trying to choose the right words to say._

_"I keep it to myself for a very long time. I've always thought of confessing my feelings to you. However, you were my first friend who accepted me for who I am. You know how much I don't like to interact with other people, yet you were able to barge inside my life. You stayed even though I'm not the best. I don't want our friendship to go in vain just because of my unrequited love for you. Although, sometimes I believe that somehow you also have feelings for me. I thought that at some point, I am also special to you because you always treated me nicely, you care for me, you are always there for me. But, then, I realized that you are just a really nice person who cares for everyone around you and someone to depend on. Maybe, you just see me as a sibling that should be taken care of."_

_"But-"_

_He stopped me before I can even defend myself._

_"Please, don't be bothered about me telling you this. What am I even saying?" He laughed before continuing to speak._

_No, Kenma. You don't understand. I don't only see you as my friend or sibling. I like you, Kenma. No. I love you. All the moments we shared are embedded in my mind. Every second we spent together are the best time of my life. When I'm with you I'm at my best. You are the only person I've ever laid my eyes on and have taken interest right away. For me, you are always the best. You are the most beautiful person in my eyes and I love you for who you are._

_In the end, I can only say these words to myself._

_"Anyway, you don't need to feel pressured because I'm over those feelings. The main reason I called you today is because of this."_

_Kenma handed me a white envelope with a gold seal on the middle._

_"What is this?" I asked as I opened the envelope only to be shocked about what's written on the cards._

**_YOU ARE CORDIALLY INVITED TO THE WEDDING OF KOZUME KENMA AND HINATA SHOYO!_ **

_"It's a wedding invitation. I'm getting married, Kuroo."_ _I was stunned trying to process what he said. It was deafening._ _"Remember Hinata Shoyo, the volleyball player from Karasuno that we had a match with during high school? We kind of kept in contact after the match. During those times that we talked, I somehow forget about my feelings for you. You know what? He's really cheerful, energetic, and passionate, unlike me. But he always tell me how I am the best in games and told me I might become successful in this field."_

 _Kenma, please stop. I don't want to hear it._ _I want to be selfish. I want to stop him from talking about how he already moved on while I'm still stucked with these feelings for years. But I can't. I can see in his eyes how happy he is with his new-found love. I can see how Kenma was able to see the best in him._

_"By the way, you also have something to tell me, right? What is it?"_

_Right. How can I tell you about it now, when you just told me that you no longer like me and that you're getting married?_ _I smiled at him and shake my head._

_"No, don't mind it. It's not that important. I'm happy that you finally found your happiness, Kenma. You no longer need me because you already have another person to lean on, huh?"_

_"What do you mean? You're still my best friend. In fact, I want you to be my best man in our wedding."_

_Oh God. This is not what I have imagined. I want to be the one at the end of the aisle waiting for you as your future husband, not to watch you be in another man's arms._

_"I... I can't. I'll be flying abroad for a business trip on that day."_

_I lied. I'm sorry, Kenma. I might not be able to stop myself from ruining your precious day if I attend. I'd rather not. I don't want to see you with him tying the knot._

_"U-uhm, here. Take these."_

_I gave him the flowers that I bought. This isn't what I planned but at least the flowers won't go into waste. At least it is still him who received it._

_"It's just my congratulatory gift for your wedding. Don't worry, I'll still send a present on your wedding. Although, it may only be through a parcel."_

_"Thank you, Kuroo. I'm really thankful having you by my side."_

_"Everything for you, kitten. I'm always here for you."_

_"I know and I'm-"_

_Our conversation was interrupted when his phone rings. Kenma took his phone to see who the caller is. I saw how his eyes shine bright and how his smile widen upon seeing the name on the screen._

_"I'm sorry, I'll just have to answer this call."_

_"It's okay. Take your time."_

_"Hello, Shoyo. Where am I? Im at the park near my house. Yes, I'm with Kuroo. I just handed him the invitation. We'll meet the wedding planner again today, right? Yes, I'll be on my way. Take care. Bye. I love you too, Shoyo."_

_I love you too, Shoyo_

_I love you too, Shoyo_

_I love you too, Shoyo_

_His last words were ringing to my ear on repeat._

_"I'll be going now, Kuroo. Sorry, I have taken much of your time blabbering about the past."_

_"It's fine. I really don't mind. Take care, Kenma."_

_No. I'm really bothered. How can I not? After telling me that these feelings are not unrequited for God knows how long. I'm so stupid._

_"Thank you, Kuroo."_

_He hugged me and smiled before bidding his good-bye._

_"Looks like I missed the timing, eh?"_

_I said to myself as I watch his back moving away from me._

_My mind is slowly filled with regrets. I should have listened when Yaku told me to confess. I should have not wasted my time. I was too afraid to risk our friendship, now I'll bring it with me until the end. I can now be by your side until the end, as your friend._

We were on the same page, but we did not see each other. I was too oblivious to see through you, and you were the same. We are standing on the same line, but it was our backs that are facing. As we try to find the other, we were slowly drifting away. 

I can't believe that I was just that near to reach you. If only I extended my arms and made an effort. And when I finally decided to run after you, you were already too far. Too far that even though how much I try so hard, I can no longer catch you. Someone gave you wings and made you out of my reach.

"Congratulations, Kenma! No matter what happen, you will always have a special place in my heart."

This is the choice I made and I must stand by it. I smiled for the last time and turned my back from the church. 

What happens when you keep your feelings towards another person to yourself? The thought of trusting time may have cross your mind, believing that it will all be gone soon. However, it does not apply to everyone. Some feelings do not fade but it continuously grow unbeknownst to the owner.

As I walked away, I bumped into a tall man. 

"I'm sorry." 

"Must have been hard to see when your hair is blocking one of your eyes. If you don't want to change your weird hairstyle, then pay attention to your surroundings." 

I raised my head to see the man speaking. He looked familiar but I don't remember where I have seen him. He looked at me with a salty expression. Then, he started to walk away from me. 

**Author's Note:**

> Comments are highly appreciated.  
> Thank you for reading.


End file.
